Madi's Essay

The topic of my essay is:
Loss, and how people wonder if they matter in the world.

My first sentence is:
"In Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close by Jonathan Safran Foer, Oskar wonders if he matters in the world, due to his feelings of extreme loneliness, caused by the devastating loss of his father."

Questions raised by this:
Why is Oskar alone?
Does he matter in the world?
Why does Oskar even wonder if he matters?
How does this loneliness affect Oskar?
How does this change him?

Evidence:
Page 37 - "But then I had the tips of my fingers on the vase, and the tragedies started to wobble, and the tuxedo was incredibly distracting, and the next thing was that everything was on the floor, including me, and including the vase, which had shattered. "I didn't do it!" I hollered, but they didn't even hear me, because they were playing music too loud and cracking up too much, I zipped myself into the sleeping bag of myself, not because I was hurt, and not because I had broken something, but because they were cracking up."

Page 145 - "I felt, that night, on that stage, under that skull, incredibly close to everything in the universe, but also extremely alone.

Page 201 - "I was wondering if perhaps some of what you've been experiencing is due to changes in your body. It isn't. It's because my dad died the most horrible death that anyone ever could invent."

Page 244-245 - "Which would I choose? Would I jump or would I burn? I guess I would jump, because then I wouldn't have to feel pain. On the other hand, maybe I would burn, because then I'd at least have a chance to somehow escape, and even if I couldn't, feeling pain is still better than not feeling, isn't it?"

Page 254 - "Listen. Oskar? That's my name don't wear it out. I think I'm finished. Finished with what? I hope you understand. He stuck out his hand for a shake."

Page 254 - "And then I came straight here, and now I don't know what to do."

Page 255 - "I've been searching for more than six months, and I didn't know a single thing that I didn't know six months ago...Also I've had to tell a googolplex lies, which doesn't make me feel good about myself, and I've bothered a lot of people who I've probably ruined my chances of ever being real friends with, and I miss my dad more than when I started, even though the whole point was to stop missing him. I told him, It's starting to hurt too much."

Page 286 - "I wish I had known that I wasn't going to see Mr. Black again when we shook hands that afternoon. I wouldn't have let go. Or I would have forced him to keep searching with me. Or I would have told him about how Dad called when I was home. But I didn't known, just like I didn't known it was the last time Dad would ever tuck me in, because you never know."

Page 287 - "When I got home that afternoon, after eight months of searching New York, I was exhausted and frustrated and pessimistic, even though what I wanted to be was happy."

Page 288 - "Why didn't she try to stop me, or at least keep me safe?"

Page 290 - "It was nice to think about, because what I wanted to be was empty."

Page 291 - "All of a sudden I understood why, when Mom asked where I was going, and I said "Out," she didn't ask any questions. She didn't have to, because she knew."

Page 292 - "My search was a play that Mom had written, and she knew the ending when I was at the beginning."

Page 295 - "If I'd been alone, I would have given myself the biggest bruise of my life. I would have turned myself into one big bruise."