About chapter 2

In the second chapter, the narrator has the problem speaking.

“Does it break my heart, of course, every moment of every day, into more pieces than my heart was made of, I never thought f myself as quiet, much less silent, I never thought about things at all, everything wasn’t the world, it wasn’t the bombs and burning buildings, it was me, my thinking, the cancer of never letting go, is ignorance bliss, I don’t know, but it’s so painful to think, and tell me, what did thinking ever do for me, to what great place did thinking ever bring me? I think and think and think, I’ve thought myself out of happiness one million times, but never once into it.” 

This quote really hit me. Even he tattooed himself YES and NO on each hand, he couldn’t really express what he was thinking. He lost his connection with the other people. YES and NO could be the answers of people’s questions. However, it would not be enough to express what he wanted to say, it would not be enough to let people know him. It makes me think about how O craves for the answer. The answer is not enough to sacrifice people, probably the process is the thing that actually matters. And O might realize that on his journey of finding the lock. He starts to write things down on the paper to communicate with people. I wonder why he only writes one phrase on every paper. It makes him run out of paper easily. “if something made me want to laugh, I’d write ‘Ha ha ha!’” This quote is fairly gloomy to read. It shows how much he wants people to know how he feels.